finance jokes


M

mackbest

Does anybody know any finance related jokes? if so....please share them
with us no matter how bad they are.

to start off here's one:

what do government bonds and women have in common? they both take long
time to mature!
 
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D

DarkProtoman

Here's one: A new, cheap way for the govt to refinance: the zero coupon
perpetuity. Uncle Sam'll take your $10,000 and then'll it'll accrue
interest...forever!!! You just lost $10,000!!!

Or, sign's you're at a bad bank:

When you make a deposit, tellers high-five each other
After you get a free toaster, bank president shows up at your house
begging for toast
Your monthly statements are handwritten in crayon
When you want to make a withdrawal, clerks suddenly don't speak English

You notice Kato Kaelin sleeping in the vault
Your safety deposit box is a Dunkin' Donuts carton wrapped in tinfoil
All cash deposits go directly into teller's pants
Lobby is waist-deep in Mexican pesos
Toll free customer service line is 1-800-GET HOSED
Four words: Bank President Rosa Lopez
Instead of compounding your money, they discount it.
Your checks in your checkbook are handwritten
They have not quite understood the concept of a "loan" yet

Can anyone think of more?
 
T

Tumbleweed

Does anybody know any finance related jokes? if so....please share them
with us no matter how bad they are.

to start off here's one:

what do government bonds and women have in common? they both take long
time to mature!
I think that ones wrong, should be men, not women!
 
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M

M Holmes

Does anybody know any finance related jokes? if so....please share them
with us no matter how bad they are.
Three econometrists go hunting. They spot a deer. The first econometrist
shoots and misses to the left by a yard. The second econometrist shoots
and misses to the right by a yard. The third econometrist whoops and
yells "We got it! We got it!"
 
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T

Tumbleweed

M Holmes said:
Three econometrists go hunting. They spot a deer. The first econometrist
shoots and misses to the left by a yard. The second econometrist shoots
and misses to the right by a yard. The third econometrist whoops and
yells "We got it! We got it!"

....the fourth, House Price Crash economist, says 'the deer will be shot at
some time in the future so lets get the barbeque started now"
 

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